"Ekspektasi besar mungkin pada akhirnya terlalu sering ngecewain kita. Tapi doa-doa besar ga akan pernah mengecewakan, karena Tuhan yang ngasih jamin di masa depan."
"So, instead of expect big, could you just pray big?"
A warm conversation in October 29th night, 2014.
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Bismillah...
Well, I'm in the middle of entering another new door of journey. Another jumping stone. I used to face something I don't want. For example, I want normal high school life but I got acceleration program. I want to study architecture but I majored in agroindustrial technology. I wanna be an entrepreneur who open a clothing line or being a graphic design freelancer but I am officially an corporate officer, an executive woman, professional-to-be.
From my life experiences, I was built to be a non-idealistic person. My dreams never come true. But instead of mocking my own life that seems s*ck, I try to find something to learn from what I've got and find my own happiness from them. It's technically my life, I'm the one who drive and draw.
Being an acceleration student I finished my school faster than others. I may not be an architect and can not build my own home with my own design, but I can build my own factory from my current major. I may not be an entrepreneur, but I will be a professional soon with a short and accountable path trough management trainee.
My life that I have passed gave me a beautiful gift that may not be found if I did not walk trough my current path:
I found my friends that might be can not be found anywhere. We still meet each other until now. That fact made me so much grateful and never regret. My family are satisfied with my current achievements. Their happiness are enough for me to move forward.
And the last. I always have someone who give his/her encouraging words to help me in case I forget. Me myself also often make and write my own encouraging words, so world will read them and feel what I felt. At least that is what I imagine.
And now, I'm facing another thing that I have never wanted to try. It seems hard enough but I'm trying my best to erase this mental block.
From my life experiences I always judge myself as a flexible and easy-to-adapt person. Life always give challenges. It is your choice whether face it and improving or runaway from it and stagnant. I prefer, believe in yourself and fight it! :)
