The Other Me

Bismillah...

Nowadays people keep asking 'kenapa sih lu, May?'. Unfortunately, I'm changing into a person I don't know either. Everytime I try to get to myself back, I get lost. Sometimes everythings feel so fine, and the next moment I am lost again.

I am trying hard to keep my mind straight. But everytime I push myself to that point, the rest are in pain. My heart, my soul, my body. When I feel I can't keep up with those pains, I loose. And the other me wins.

And then people will ask, 'kenapa sih lu, May?'.

The reasons are a lot. Those ups and downs, and the feeling of can't share those I feel, with my family. The burden of being all alone. The feeling of turn off life.

That's the other me.

I cant be with her. I wish her gone. She's destructive.

Been A While, Buddy!

Bismillah...

Hi Buddy! How are you? I saw our latest posts was sooo desperate, rite? Thats true. The end of 2015 and early 2016 are my hardest part of my life. The moment I fought with my own self. The moment I try hard to be survived. The moment I try to believe in myself more.

And now, I thought everythings getting better. I feel more grateful and doing better. Try to sum up activities and choose things to select them as my happiness that I need to be grateful for, everyday. In that way, I will value myself more than before.

I spam a lot in my social media accounts but why bother much? Those are social media anyway. To socializing with each other rite? Not to always be silent reader everyday and night.

I start to meet my life tempo back. I try to keep up with that. Wish everythings getting much much better, ya May! Aamiin.